This guy is an ass

Nobody understands this guy when he talks. He'll make up words and phrases, and say them with such a straight face that you have to believe him. His designs are incoherent. He is a maverick. Because nobody understands what he says, he thinks he is incredibly gifted. The actual reason nobody understands what he says is because he is an idiot.

Clippy is the worst piece of junk I have ever encountered.

I asked a simple question: "How do you update all fields in a document?"

The answers:

• Troubleshoot templates and letters
• Field codes: Autotext field
• None of the above: search for more on the Web
  

That is the most pathetic attempt at help I have ever seen. I don't want an animated paperclip, I just want to update my fields (which incidentally should happen automatically anyway). Clippy remains fun for about 2 seconds. I think given the quality of the answers, he should be replaced by a cripple in a wheelchair - if you could wheel him around the screen I would probably find that more entertaining.

Trying to move a computer

We get a new PC. Hurray!

The trauma begins. Endless cycles of downloading updates, and rebooting every 5 minutes. Have MS still not solved the problem? Next, trying to copy data from one PC to another. There's this piece of junk called "File Transfer Wizard". For some reason, it requres to be installed on removable media - huh? I have a network thankyou. Don't have removable media on desktop. Eventually find an SD card, and an SD card adaptor for the old laptop. Guess what, the reason we're upgrading is because it is an old piece of junk with not many ports... Anyway eventually we coax it to running, and eventually we coax it into copying files onto a network share. For some reason it decides to back up the entire hard disk, including all of the photos on the SD card. Takes hours and several attempts. Run the File transfer wizard on new PC. It refuses to recognise the contents of the share.

Next step - try to copy the Application data directly. Works kind-of, except that the length of a filename is exceeded and Windows 98 truncates it. Can't copy that way. Download two different zip software, try to zip up the data. Both result in corrupt ZIP files. Attempt to export Outlook express data - fails miserably. Tries to export the data to Outlook on same computer. Run Outlook, export data from that.

Now try to copy Outlook data across network. Win98 decides it's going suddenly and sponteneously fail to browse the network. It is teasing me with its smug red little computer icon.
Finally, copy onto SD card, copy to other laptop, copy across network, and import. Success!